29 Things People With Children Do When Their Spouse is Out Of Town

Hey Buzzfeed, I think you’re really fun! And I enjoy the little smiles and chuckles I have to myself while I read your lists and take your quizzes in car-line to pick up my kids from school. But I most recently read your “29 Things Married People Do When Their Spouse Goes Out of Town“. And although a couple seemed to hit home, this list should clearly have been titled “29 Things Married People Without Children Do When Their Spouse Goes Out of Town”

Let me help you out here with my own list “29 things married people with children do when their spouse goes out of town”

1. Do at least one load of laundry a day
2. Pick up and drop off the kids at school

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© Sarah Moudry. All Rights Reserved.

3. Load and unload the dishwasher repeatedly
4. Pack lunches
5. Support each child while doing their homework
6. Say no a million times to more screen time
7. Field any calls from the school on inappropriate behavior your child is showing due to a “lack of positive attention” at home
8. Try to remember to eat occasionally
9. Go to one sports practice per kid at least once that week
image10. Take the trash out
11. Try to remember to shower
12. Play at least 1 game of monopoly, sorry, or candyland daily
13. Turn the clocks ahead an hour while the children are distracted so they don’t notice you are putting them to bed early
14. Chase the monsters away before bed
15. Fight the monsters back into the closet in the middle of the night
16. Read books to each child (no matter their age)
17. Calm any tears that come from missing the other parent
18. Schedule video calls with spouse to keep the family connected
19. Manage the chaos that ensues during a video call (usually some sort of dance or vocal performance)

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© Sarah Moudry. All Rights Reserved.

20. Pour extra large glasses of wine while trying to dodge the judgement and reporting to your spouse by your oldest child
21. Balance the roles of police officer and tickle monster
22. Make breakfast for dinner

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© Sarah Moudry. All Rights Reserved.

23. Go to bed with a glass of wine and a reality tv marathon as soon as you tuck the kids in
24. Clean the poop off the wall before a playdate
25. Stop at every Starbucks you drive by and get the children Frappacinos each time

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© Sarah Moudry. All Rights Reserved.

26. Get a babysitter and meet your friends for drinks.
27. Organize the kids toys, ’cause this time it will work!
28. Call your mom for back-up but don’t tell your spouse you needed it.
29. Get all the extra hugs and kisses you can stand :)
(30. Do what single parents do every day; hats off to all of you!)

Sarah

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